Yes and No

How often do you say ‘yes’ and ‘no’ to the ‘right’ kinda things in your day?

Zaharaiades, author of ‘The Art of saying No’ says that “It’s unsurprising that we often say yes when we know we should say no. It’s an instinctive response born of our longing for other people’s approval.”

Zahariades says the reason we can’t say no is…

1. ‘To avoid offending people’

2. ‘To avoid disappointing people’

3. ‘To avoid seeming selfish’

4. ‘To help others’

5. ‘To build up low self-esteem’

6. ‘To get others to like us’

7. ‘To appeal valuable’

8. ‘To avoid missing out on opportunities’

9. ‘To avoid emotional bullying’

10. ‘To prevent conflict’

Gotta love this from the author…

‘Saying no without feeling like a jerk.’

How?! Zahariades gives some pointers:

1. ‘Be direct’

2. ‘Don’t stall for time’

3. ‘Replace ‘no’ with another word

4. ‘Resist the urge to offer excuses’

5. ‘Take ownership of your decision’

6. ‘Ask the requester to follow up later’

7. ‘Avoid lying about your availability’

8. ‘Offer an alternative strategy’

9. ‘Describe your lack of bandwith’

10. ‘Be resolute’

11. ‘Be courteous’

12. ‘Say no by category’

“If you don’t prioritize your life, someone else will.” (Mckeown)

Knowing when to say ‘yes’ and when to say ‘no’ is a skill you’ll continually refine.



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